When Someone Has the Courage to Speak from the Heart…

Yesterday I attended a small gathering and I was inspired to hear a man I hadn’t met before speak authentically from his heart; he expressed a vulnerability he was currently experiencing.  He spoke with complete candor, unabashedly, with the genuineness of an innocent child.  I was touched; I felt drawn to him.  Connection–simple, real, genuine–and I thought to myself, how utterly lovely that he is able to speak so freely without any worry or even the slightest concern about being judged by those who heard what he had to say.  As he spoke, he put his hand on the center of his chest and gently rubbed it in a circular, soothing motion; this gesture of kindness for himself touched my heart; it made me sigh.

I hoped I might get the chance to speak privately with him and express my gratitude for his courage to be so open but the opportunity did not arise.  Someone else reached him before I did and he willingly allowed himself to be taken hostage by her for some time, listening raptly to the mountains of advice she heaped upon him–advice he did not ask for but eagerly absorbed, almost as if he was awed by some mysterious ancient, ethereal wisdom he assumed she possessed.

Actually, I watched their interaction with fascination; it was like a choreographed duet: her pontificating, him silently nodding and acquiescing like a puppy eager to learn at the foot of its master. What was so interesting to me was the role they each assumed: her–the mystical sage, him–the earnest pupil.  She seemed to be speaking from her heart as she instructed him, never realizing for a moment that the advice she was flooding him with was really advice her own heart needed to hear–but most definitely not his.  The more she counseled him, the more he distanced himself from his own truth and authenticity.  As I observed and listened to their dynamic, I thought, how very unfortunate that rather than honor him for being so beautifully in touch with his internal truth when he had spoken earlier, instead, she, by assuming the role of the all-knowing guide, pulled him away from himself and weakened the connection he had earlier established to his inner core. She even discouraged him from tenderly rubbing that spot on his chest and ascribed to it a negative connotation.

This sort of well-meaning interaction tends to be quite typical with respect to conventional counseling and one of its inherent weaknesses is that it flows out of the beta brain wave where analysis, judgment, and criticism abide.  In this case, although the woman may have been coming from a place of loving intention and caring, the affect her suggestions had on this man to some degree lessened his power because it caused him to stray from his own truth while seeking to learn from hers.

With Theta Healing, exactly the opposite occurs.  It is the theta brain waves that engender healing precisely because judgment, analysis, and other evaluative left brain functions do not occur there. Instead, Theta Healing promotes connection, acceptance, forgiveness, tolerance and all the essential elements of unity with one’s self and others.  Theta Healing is affirmative, assisting one to delve deeper within to discover more truth of the open heart and spirit.  Theta Healing honors personal discovery and revelation.

What I would have liked to say to that man was that I heard and valued his experience, that it resonated with me and even inspired me.  I would have liked to tell him that when he tenderly rubbed his own chest, I saw it as a loving gesture of self acceptance and it gave me joy to see him do it.

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My Theta Embrace with a Tree

I remember a day when as a child, maybe seven or eight years old, I was standing outside in front of my home beside a huge, old tree; there was not a single other person anywhere in sight; the street was empty in both directions.

I remember for some unknowable reason, I felt a strong urge to lean into the tree, press myself against it and wrap my arms around it in a tight embrace.  The trunk was so wide that my arms did not even reach half way around its massive bulk and the bark was scratchy against my tender skin but I didn’t care.  I stood there like that, hugging that tree for a long time–so long in fact, that in my childhood innocence, I easily dropped into a Theta brain wave and zoned out from the world around me; it was just the tree and me hanging on to it as if nothing else in the world existed.

Of course, I was not aware at the time that I had slowed down my breathing and inadvertently accessed a Theta brain wave but what I did know was that I felt utterly and completely safe, at peace, and unconditional love flowed into me and through me; it was rapture.  I didn’t really know or care where the love was coming from–I just felt it–and that’s why I stood there for so long, just absorbing it and the peacefulness of my Theta induced embrace with that tree.

More than fifty years has passed since that sunny day and I remember it as if it just happened to me moments ago.  I can see that little girl with long, thick, wavy blonde hair with her little arms wrapped around that big, old tree and feeling connected, protected, valued and safe.  It was a precious momentary energetic healing for a child who needed it.

When I initially took the training to become a certified ThetaHealing practitioner, the first time I put myself into a Theta state, I though of that childhood tree embrace and was reminded that as a child, my real world lacked the unconditional love, security and protection I needed.  My child’s world was a lonely and threatening place.  Now, on a daily basis, I reconnect with that little girl inside of me and give her what she needs to feel safe, valued, appreciated, seen, and heard.  I am the only one on the planet who can give her exactly what she needs in exactly the way she wants it.  The more my adult selfs parents my child self, the more whole I feel as an adult; the more I can love fully and receive love.